I led a pretty charmed life as a kid. One of my favorite things growing up was visiting my grandparents on their farm. There was never a lack of things to do or space to run around. And the animals! Oh, the animals were my favorite. They had horses and cows, chickens, rabbits, dogs and cats. It was (in my 5-year-old mind) a magical place.
Around this tender age of five, I decided that I needed an animal of my own. One I could take back to my house in the ‘burbs to love and cherish forever and ever. So one afternoon my mom and I sat down to pick one out of a newish litter of kittens. I sat there and let the kittens crawl all over my lap while I petted and studied each one.
After a few moments I had made my choice. I just KNEW this little kitten and I were meant to be. He was a splotchy black and white little furball and I LOVED him. And I knew that this awesome kitten who was now mine would need a name, but not just any name would do. He needed a name that encompassed his furry little personality. And so, after a few moments of deliberation, I decided on Stormymittens Thundercloud. It was perfect! And I rode home with him on a towel in the backseat of my mom’s car and stroked his fur and talked to him about how much he was going to love his new home.
When we got home I made him the softest bed imaginable on the floor of the garage (my mom wouldn’t let him inside until he’d gone to the vet), and went to bed dreaming of all of the fun adventures we would have together.
The next morning I rushed out of bed to see my darling, precious Stormymittens and as I threw open the door to the garage he sprung into my arms…
No, I’m kidding. The little bastard was gone. The garage door had been left open a teeny-tiny crack so that he would have fresh air and the little asshole had squirmed underneath it and run away. I was devastated. And I learned an important life lesson.
You can never trust a kitten.
Although with a name like Stormymittens Thundercloud I suppose he couldn’t really be expected to live a domestic life.





